Monday, November 5, 2012

Chocolate understands

On Saturday, we set out for the mall, Ergo baby carrier in tow. I had used it once before at home and Sarah fell asleep while I was unpacking from our Bangalore roadtrip, so I was really excited to use it outside. Well, turns out when you have a slippery hijab, one extremely heavy diaper bag (should've lightened it) and a baby sitting in the Ergo while its straps couldn't be adjusted properly, it really gets you down. Then there was some discussion about if we would have lunch outside and I was overwhelmed just thinking about it. That was followed by my looking around at the other people in the mall -- they looked so carefree. We had walked into Lifestyle and it was terribly warm, I think they keep the airconditioning off to cut costs and I just wanted to get out. The one thing that I really wanted to buy that day, I couldn't find. I saw some people with this amazing stroller and was questioning my decision to buy the carrier and our horrible experience with the Just Born stroller after which we decided not to buy one at all for the time being. So all of this became one thick pudding in my sleep-deprived head and even though I'd started the day ecstatic that I was back in my old pair of jeans,  I started sulking so M finally asked what was wrong. I find it very difficult to articulate my feelings when I'm down and you can see that was a big list! So I just said one of the things that had annoyed me and then that I was finding 'things difficult'. To which M said, 'Look we've been outside for so long today' and I thought that was exactly my point, we had been outside for so long but I was already tired and we had accomplished nothing! (Except for a double scoop of Baskin31Robbins' Bavarian chocolate)

So if you've read this whole huge paragraph (wow!), his comment just made me even more disappointed and  I ended up ruining his mood too. When we got home I decided to go by the things I was reading about 'Wastaeenu bissabri was salaat' (Seek help with patience and prayer) and decided to talk to Allah ta'ala about how I was feeling. A few minutes later I found myself counting the blessings I had and feeling very silly (but happy) for making such a big deal out of nothing. We made up, that was that.

So yesterday I was browsing this baby sleep website (Sarah's been giving me some trouble lately, probably our fault for screwing up her old routine) and I saw this post of hers called 'It's one of those days...'

Have I ever mentioned that I keep a stash of candy (and chocolate!) on hand at all times when I have a new baby. Chocolate really does understand ;)

I was thinking about how difficult it is to explain my muddled up feelings when I'm in one of those moods, and I burst out laughing... chocolate does understand. Especially Dairy Milk Silk that M keeps getting so much of!

PS: I even have a fridge magnet that says: "There's nothing wrong with me a little chocolate can't fix" :D Well, soon we'll add patience and prayer to the mix too, insha'allah :)

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