Monday, December 31, 2012
Tuesday, December 18, 2012
"He is controlling the affairs of all the kingdoms. He commands and prohibits, creates and gives provision, and gives death and gives life. He raises and lowers people's status, alternates night and day, gives days (good and not so good) to men by turns, and causes nations to rise and fall, so that one nation vanishes and another emerges. His command and decree are carried out throughout the heavens and on earth, above it and below it, in the oceans and in the air. He has knowledge of all things and knows the number of all things. He hears all voices, and does not mistake one for another; He hears them all, in all the different languages and with all their varied requests and pleas. No voice distracts Him from hearing another, He does not confuse their requests, and He never tires of hearing the pleas of those in need. He sees all that is visible, even the walk of a black ant across a solid rock in the darkest night. The unseen is visible to Him, and secrets are known to Him; "Whosoever is in the heavens and on earth begs of Him (its needs from Him). Every day He has a matter to bring forth (such as giving honour to some, disgrace to some, life to some, death to some, etc.)!" [al-Rahman 55:29]. He forgives sins, eases worries, relieves distress, helps the defeated person back on his feet, makes the poor rich, guides the one who is astray and confused, fulfils the needs of the desperate, feeds the hungry, clothes the naked, conceals faults, and calms fears. He raises the status of some and lowers the status of others; Even if all the inhabitants of heaven and earth, the first and the last of them, mankind and jinn alike, were to be as pious as the most pious among them, this would not increase His sovereignty in the slightest; if they all, the first and the last of them, mankind and jinn alike, were to be as rebellious as the most rebellious among them, this would not decrease His sovereignty in the slightest. If everything in heaven and on earth, the first and the last of them, mankind and jinn, living and dead, animate and inanimate, were to stand in one place and ask of Him, and He were to give them everything that they asked for, this would not decrease what He has by even an atom's weight He is the First, before Whom there is nothing, and the Last, after Whom there is nothing, may He be blessed and exalted. He is the Most deserving of being remembered, the Most deserving of being worshipped, the Most deserving of being thanked. He is the Most Compassionate of kings, the Most Generous of those who are asked. He is the King Who has no partner or associate, the One who has no rival, the Self-Sufficient Master, Who has no son, the Most High, and there is none like unto Him. "Everything will perish save His face" [al-Qasas 28:88], and everything will vanish except His sovereignty; He will not be obeyed except by His permission, and He will not be disobeyed except with His knowledge. He is obeyed, so He shows His appreciation, and He is disobeyed, so he forgives. Every punishment on His part is justice, and every blessing from Him is a favour. He is the closest of witnesses and the nearest of protectors. He seizes people by their forelocks, records their deeds and decrees the appointed time for all things. Hearts conceal nothing from Him, for secrets are known to Him. His gift is a word and His punishment is a word: "Verily, His Command, when He intends a thing, is only that He says to it, "Be!" and it is." [Ya Seen 36:82]."
(From al-Waabil al-Sayib, p. 125 by ibn al-Qayyim Rahimahullah)
Wednesday, December 12, 2012
Sarah, you turned 5 months old today, alhamdulillah! Can't believe that you're just a month shy of the big 6! Then we can start you on solid food insha'allah, yayy!
Please promise me you'll start sleeping better then! Since we're on that topic, can I say that the last two months have been really tough sleepwise? You wake up a zillion times in the night and in the last few days, your naps have been all over the place!
Last week was very stressful with both of us being down with cold and congestion, then just as I was beginning to make friends with other mommies in the apartment block, you caught conjunctivitis! Latching had also become an issue, so we said goodbye to your best friend, the pacifier. Or MY best friend. So I don't know who it's been more tough on. You cried a lot the first few nights, which almost made me cry too. We regressed back to the bouncer, your mosquito net umbrella broke and the new one is too easy for you to play with, and I'm still wondering what to do about swaddling you. These are such huge issues for me mainly because I'm still trying to figure out how we can sleep better without becoming a snappier, moodier version of myself. I don't think anyone else gets that, except maybe the other moms on my birth board. Sometimes, I wonder if they even should, because then I'm worrying about worrying too much!
Okay so now that we're done with the doom and gloom, there were a number of wonderfully sweet things that happened this month:
#1: It was a dreary Friday morning and I was sitting beside your abbu and you were seated between us on the sofa. You were busy sucking your middle and ring fingers. Your adb (abbudaddybaba) was looking tired so I said he should sleep more during the weekend when you suddenly burst out laughing... And then you kept laughing every few minutes. That was the first and only time so far that we saw you laughing without being provoked. You still haven't told us what the joke was.
#2: At one of your MOTN wakings, I changed your diaper and left your drowsy self on the bed to go wash my hands. When I came back in less than a couple of minutes you were fast asleep, lying on your side, one hand tightly clasped around abd's finger (his hands just happened to be outstretched in your direction). It was so sweet that I didn't dare move you till a few minutes later you rolled onto your back again.
#3: yesterday you and abd made a nice game of bidding him goodbye when he left for office: your abd kept kissing you and you would keep turning your cheek to him and laughing.
Now for some general things:
- you shout for quite a few minutes before falling asleep. This can be very frustrating because you have a really loud voice for such a tiny person and you even do it in the MOTN (all such abbreviations are carryovers from babycenter forums).
- when you're happy and you know, you screech
- you're very distracted during feedings and will frequently look up at me (thank you)
- you often show your enjoyment of something by giving an awfully cute open mouthed smile.
- you sometimes say mmmn when you cry and whisper "ha" for fun
- you can sit for a couple of minutes before toppling over which you find funny
- you give me open mouthed kisses (thank you)
- these days you keep lunging when sitting and flail like superman during tummytime
- you seem to like pooing on your poor abd and once spitup in his hair when he was carrying you around the house on his shoulders (cue open mouthed grin)
- you still can't roll from your back to your tummy
- you can get really mad and shout before you start crying
- your first train rides were mostly uneventful if you ignore the crying spells
- you're the apple of your grand parents' eyes, especially on your abd's side being the first grandchild and all
Your current nicknames: mitthi, giddu, sarahbb, chotib, cutieb, laddub, honeyb (b is a carryover from the ammaarah era), casper (what your adb calls you when you wear your white sleepsuit), choochoo (abd's favourite), pitoli mamma (baba)
I love you sarahbb.
Wednesday, November 21, 2012
WHAT is going on with your sleep?! You're waking me up a crazy number of times every night and I know there's a 4 month sleep regression but no one I know seems to have it this bad. You better straighten your sleep because your 5th month post is hanging in the balance!
We'll be taking your first train ride today Allah. Have some pity on the other passengers and please, let me sleep.
Wednesday, November 14, 2012
Saturday, November 10, 2012
Masha'allah, in the past few days you learned how to/have been:
- give your toes a tour of your mouth
- stuffing two or three fingers in you mouth and then making choking noises
- becoming hyperactive just before bedtime and doing things like hanging on to my arm with both your arms and trying to lick it
- making your pigeon-like guttural noises more loudly and at a faster pace
- doing your first mini-pushup and within just a day of learning how to do that...
- rolling from your tummy to your back! Alhamdulillah, I've been watching you struggle to roll over and back... And I had never realized that this was a skill that takes so much effort and persistence to learn. I was waiting to see how you would figure it out and now I see how the mini pushup helped
- I think you recognize me now, I mean visibly. Yesterday, you started pumping your hands and legs and smiled at me when I walked into the room
- Your dad says you've also learned to take the pacifier out of your mouth and sit in a contemplative mood with your pacifier in your hand. I wonder what you think about...
- these days you can amuse yourself on your own for longer periods of time by simply sucking on your fingers, or rolling around by putting your legs in the air and then bringing them back down somewhere else
- shrieking and laughing with high pitched squeaks!
Love you Sarahbb,
Monday, November 5, 2012
So if you've read this whole huge paragraph (wow!), his comment just made me even more disappointed and I ended up ruining his mood too. When we got home I decided to go by the things I was reading about 'Wastaeenu bissabri was salaat' (Seek help with patience and prayer) and decided to talk to Allah ta'ala about how I was feeling. A few minutes later I found myself counting the blessings I had and feeling very silly (but happy) for making such a big deal out of nothing. We made up, that was that.
So yesterday I was browsing this baby sleep website (Sarah's been giving me some trouble lately, probably our fault for screwing up her old routine) and I saw this post of hers called 'It's one of those days...'
Have I ever mentioned that I keep a stash of candy (and chocolate!) on hand at all times when I have a new baby. Chocolate really does understand ;)
I was thinking about how difficult it is to explain my muddled up feelings when I'm in one of those moods, and I burst out laughing... chocolate does understand. Especially Dairy Milk Silk that M keeps getting so much of!
PS: I even have a fridge magnet that says: "There's nothing wrong with me a little chocolate can't fix" :D Well, soon we'll add patience and prayer to the mix too, insha'allah :)
Sunday, November 4, 2012
Thursday, November 1, 2012
Sunday, October 28, 2012
What a physically and mentally draining day today has been and Sarah has little to do with it. Alhamdulillah alaa kulli haal.
Some quick updates:
- Sarah will put her hands in mine when I extend them and say "Aao"
- She smiles at new people whenever she meets them. Today she sat in some stranger aunty's lap at the masjid while I prayed
- first attempt at eating out at a proper restaurant - FAIL! Unless you count stuffing in Chinese food while the significant other walks around with her a success. Again, as soon as we got home she was SO HAPPY!
- Likes di-di-di-ditcha. Laughed a few times today.
- Saw Nunu's crawling video today. SO CUTE! And her mom is SO MEAN!
- Cooked today.. Nothing to call home about. In fact, if I tell Mummy sll the things that went wrong, she'll probably give me her standard dialogue: "Isiliye bolte kitchen mein khade rehke dekhna" :/
- The PAX could meet up but they probably won't be able to
- we sold our first bed
- it's not Eid when you're away from home or not at the masjid. Well, at least it doesn't feel like one
- Apa keeps making fun of the Eid Mubarak Sarah video I sent x(
- I miss home. I miss Kamalapuri. I do not want to attend this fancy-shmancy wedding
- I have a gomda on my head
- the last few days were tough with Sarah being extremely fussy.
- I missed doing some items in my to-do list and now I feel loserly. The blah cooking today isn't helping
- i miss my family. Yes, that much. Guess it's because of ^.
- Actually, all I can hear in my head is a repetitive strain of "intiki pota". I should probably end this post now before it gets too repetitive.
Friday, October 26, 2012
Thursday, October 18, 2012
- Sarah's learned an amazing number of things in the last few days: more stable sitting, standing with support, trying to grab things and the sweetest thing: trying to laugh :)
- there are going to be some upheavals in the near future
- Pizza Corner's thin crust pizza is amazing
- I finally found the perfect to do list and widget combination: Astrid plus the Simple Calendar widget
- i'm addicted to two wonderful Muslim blogs: "After hardship there is ease" http://afterhardship.blogspot.in/ and http://cucumberr.wordpress.com. They're so inspiring
- making big things into smaller pieces so they're easy to accomplish
- finally completed Farhat Hashmi's Time management lecture, notes to follow insha'allah
- quit my job officially yesterday. Felt a little sad looking at people in the lift laughing and chatting. I miss the social part of work. Wrote a somewhat senti farewell email. My manager continues to disappoint me.
- also realized that not getting a salary every month makes me uncomfortable in spite of there being no need to feel that way. I want to get back into freelancing but first I need to give deen the priority I never gave it so far. Plus, I feel guilty when i'm not paying Sarah enough attention. Insha'allah, being better organized will help.
- was told yesterday that I haven't changed a bit. Well, the abayah helps, but yes, managed to squeeze into my old trousers yesterday. I still need to lose a lot of weight though
- apparetny first people wondered how I would manage married life/domestic responsibilities then thought I was doing well. then they wondered how I would manage motherhood and I'm apparently doing well at that too. Why do people have such little confidence in me? :/
- what Immu said, "bad ho, badnaam na ho"
- time to snooze for a bit. Often think I should change my blog name to that of a very popular blog because it is exactly how I feel: "Tired. Need sleep"
- okay bye
Friday, October 12, 2012
A quick recap of all that happened last month (you're really not giving me any time to do more)
1. We moved back to Mad Rascal Cutta (ok well, the first part). So you went on your first plane ride and of course your first visit at the airport (thank you GMR for the many childcare rooms you provided at the airport, we used two!). People tried to calm you down when you were wailing and once when you were quiet there were a few people cooing at you, trying to make you smile and as I walked away I heard one of them say "Kitna pyara hai na". I giggled and thought: story of your life, Sarah!
2. Let's talk about sleeping: I swaddle you after you're rocked to sleep in the bouncer and then you usually wake up once or twice in the night which alhamdulillah is finally giving me some kind of a restful sleep. I do wish you would nap for longer though! The last two days you've been fighting sleep like crazy which I really hope is some growth spurt type phase
3. After coming here you've been to ascendas and a number of baby shops to buy a stroller for you but we had the worst luck and ended up buying one at Just Born which turned out to be defective and they made us come back twice and we finally managed to exchange it for a high chair (and you haven't even started solid foods!). Please dear readers, never ever must you ever buy anything from Just Born. Even the clothes are of the cheap kind and priced two-three times what they would cost at a normal store. While trying to exchange our stroller, the store assistant found two more defective strollers and two defective high chairs! We also went to have gourmet ice-cream with your N auntie who really is great with babies. You quietly took a nap in her arms while we ate!
4. One super purchase was that of an Avent pacifier. You really seem to like this one much better than the round one you had. I guess that was really uncomfortable. Now trips outside are less stressful. Some other things that are making our life easy are the nursing cover that your Nanu stitched, the bouncer that you're addicted to, the feeding pillow from Mom & Me (I so crazy about this shoppe!), the awesome baby bather from Mee Mee from J auntie and the iPad for giving me something to do when I have to sit with you endlessly. I finally bought the ergo carrier from mom and me but this one's going to take some getting used to. Fashioned a Moby wrap from a saree of Nanima's too, it's great but takes some time getting you in and out of it.
5. You're desperately trying to sit up now, so much so that sitting in the bouncer was irritating you today. You can sit leaning against a support for a couple of minutes. When we seat you upright you love to lean forward and stare at the things in front of you. You also love looking around now, craning your neck in all directions.
When your abbudaddybaba comes back from work you give him a shy, wide smile, it seems like a special smile reserved for him. I do love your pout when you're about to cry too, it makes me laugh when I'm getting frustrated by your crying. Sometimes the pout will alternate with a smile when you can't make up your mind.
Rajeshwari and Nirmala both exclaimed how much you look like your dad with Rajeshwari repeating over and over again "Haall like baiiyya! Haall like baiyya!"
Until a week ago you were making many attempts to talk with lots of aghoos and the like, but somehow you seem to have stopped. I'm wondering if it's because the back to back stroller outings disrupted your schedule...
6. One quick story about your didi. Your nanu was sitting with her, going over her answer sheet (because Ammaarah said, "Khali B, B, B, boliye. Jo papers mein A aaya, woh toh dekhe bi nai!") and your didi's question marks in her English answer sheet were all facing right instead of left, so Nanu pointed out the teacher's corrections and said, "Yeh sab red marks nai rehna paper mein" to which your didi swiftly replied pointing at the tick marks, "Toh phir yeh, yeh yeh red marks kya hai? Yeh bhi nai rehna?!" Your didi is just too much! :)
That's all for now! Let me grab something to eat while you take a nap (finally!)
(all errors are thanks to trying to type super fast while you're asleep. Also spent some time typing and cooing at you alternately so I could get this done. I'm sure you'll understand when you have your own babies. Mhee hee hee)
Monday, September 24, 2012
Friday, September 14, 2012
You turned two months old two days ago. Yesterday mummy asked me to bring the awesome playmat that your Immu aunty got for you from upstairs. And I remembered how when Mami brought it over when you were a few days old and said to put it away for now and use it when you were two months old, I was thinking two months...will that ever come? And now I look at photos of you from then and go, wow! Was she that little?!
You've really pakaded some aang as Munawwar bi would say, masha'allah and sometimes when you're asleep in the bouncer all rounded up, your grandparents joke that the seth is asleep. Speaking of seths, so many people mistake you for a boy, it's not funny! We need more headbands! :)
This was a great month because you began smiling and what I can call hunh-ing. You even hunhed in time to my singing the alif ba ta song! You can now maintain eye contact for more than a few seconds and will even hold long smiling conversations peppered with hunhs and other sudden utterances. A couple of weeks were quite difficult, probably because of a growth spurt where you were extremely fussy when going to bed, but the last week has been much more peaceful.
It's also been a great month because alhamdulillah, alhamdulillah, alhamdulillah... You only wake me up twice a night on most nights! This is huge considering how you would wake up every couple of hours or sooner last month. Of course now you only take short naps in the daytime which means getting anything done requires either waiting for you to fall asleep or handing you over to someone else in the house. It should become easier from now on considering I ordered a baby carrier... Can't wait for it to get here! I hope you won't drown out my excitement by refusing to sit in it!
You've beenoutside in the big bad world a few more times this month... Quite a few visits to the hospital because you caught a bad cold and yeast diaper rash and for vaccinations. Hospital visits aren't an issue because the hospital has a decent changing/feeding room (i really love that hospital... Hats off to the management for maintaining such high standards in chalta hai India!) But other visits to new ghar and visits to the passport office weren't really easy. Thanks to advice from baby center, I did have a pacifier ready and the whole rigmarole would have been a bigger nightmare without it. (What would i do without babycenter!) We even managed an outing to Ohri's for ice-cream... I ate out after months! I do hope that this will get easier too when the baby carrier comes in!
You're getting better at swatting at stuff and last night when I laid you in front of me on the pillow, face to face, you kept pulling at my lips with your fingers! You have a stronger grip now and will hold our fingers and occasionally one of your rattles. You also follow people when they walk across the room until they cross your line of sight. You can also figure out in seconds that the person who was with you just now has moved away and will begin bawling. Another thing that I hope the carrier will resolve (talk about great expectations!).
Just like Julia's Life in Transition (too lazy to add the URL), my favorite baby blog at the moment, here are a few of your nicknames:
Sarah mamma (mostly ammaarah), Saroo, Sarah papa, Shona (me), chinni patang (nanu), tattumunnu pattumunnu (baba), chotu, bubbu (your dad), choochoo (also your dad), tinkii (assorted nirale aunties)
Phew. Now back to getting all the chores done while you sleep. I love you Shona and please keep smiling... It's such a happy, gummy smile masha'allah!
Wednesday, August 29, 2012
Two days ago you began to smile "socially". You had smiled at me earlier too but then you fell sick in between and I guess getting through the day was all you could manage. You smiled when you heard my voice and I was thrilled. Then you wouldn't go to sleep, or if you did, not for more than an hour. This was after you kept me awake most of the previous night so by the end of the yesterday, I was at the end of my rope. Your grandparents were also surprised at this behavior and the constant crying and took turns with you to give me a break. I really don't know how I'll manage on my own once we go back. Alhamdulillah, you slept really well last night and I hope today will be good too.
I love you so much... The world seems like such a scary place now... And when I read about deaths/famines/earthquakes/accidents I thank Alah ta'ala for being safe and sound with you and pray that Allah makes life easier for all mothers.
Tuesday, August 28, 2012
"Let not the people come to know except of your happiness, and let them not see except your smile. If life becomes constricted upon you, then within the Qur'an lies your orchard. If you feel curtailed and restricted, then to the heavens raise your call. And if they ask you of your affairs, then praise Allah and smile.
وإذا رأيت نملة في الطريق فلا تدسها وابتغ بذلك وجه الله عسى أن يرحمك كما رحمتها" . . وتذكر أنها تسبح لله فلا توقف هذا التسبيح بقتلك لها
If you see an ant on the path, then do not crush it, and seek the Face of Allah thereby, so that He will have mercy on you like you had mercy on it, and remember that it glorifies Allah, so do not halt this glorification by killing it.
وإذا مررت بعصفور يشرب من بركة ماء فلا تمر بجانبه لتخيفه " وابتغ بذلك وجه الله عسى أن يؤمنك من الخوف يوم تبلغ القلوب الحناجر
And if you pass by a bird drinking from the blessing of water, then do not pass close to it in case you startle it, and seek the Face of Allah thereby, so that He grants you safety from fear on the Day when hearts shall reach the throat.
وإذا اعترضتك قطة في وسط الطريق فتجنب أن تصدمها وابتغ بذلك وجه الله عسى أن يقيك الله ميتة السوء
And if you come across a cat in the middle of the road, then avoid hitting it, and seek the Face of Allah thereby, so that He protects you from an evil death.
واذا هممت بإلقاء بقايا الطعام فاجعل نيتك أن تأكل منها الدواب وابتغ بذلك وجه الله عسى أن يرزقك الله من حيث لا تحتسب
And if you want to throw out food, then make it your intention that animals can eat from it, and seek the Face of Allah thereby, so that He provides you from whence you do not expect.
وتذكر :~ افعل الخير مهما استصغرته فلا تدرى أى حسنة تدخلك الجنه
Do good, no matter how small it seems to you, because you do not know which good deed will enter you into Paradise.
واذا نويت نشرهذا الكلام انوى بها خير لعل الله يفرج لك كربه من كرب الدنيا والاخره
And if you wish to spread this statement, then intend good, so that Allah may relieve you of a trial from the trials of this world and the Hereafter."
From here: http://fajr.wordpress.com/2012/08/28/and-seek-the-face-of-allah-thereby/
Monday, August 27, 2012
I gave you a bath for the first time today and alhamdulillah, it was going quite well until I realized that your face was still oily from the massage and proceeded to wash your face for the second time... Then you began screaming bloody murder (and boy, can you scream...) so munawwar bi and mummy had to calm you down together.
I also wanted to note how cute you look when you stretch on waking up, like a teeny tiny starfish! you still won't make much eye contact with me but you will crane your neck in all directions to look at your Ammaarah Api/Baji (she still can't decide which) when she happens to come by. She also believes that there are times when you (intentionally) hit her or touch her foot or smile at her, and these become momentous events of the day.
You're becoming stronger now... Wanting to turn over so that you can lick the bed sheet when you get hungry or pushing the changing pad away with your feet and sliding upwards. It was a lot of fun to watch you play with your aunt too, she calls you her little gudda and played the yayy game with you. The game involves lifting up both your arms and going yayy after statements like this "mere mummy ka naam Peemmi hai... Yayy! Main Chennai ki hoon...Yayy! Mera favorite drink duddu hai...yayy!" sigh, her visit was so so short!
It's sooooooooo wonderful to be with you... But please do stop waking up at six in the morning and screaming when you can't figure out what to do with the rest of the day. Just tell me and i'll make sure we put it on your busy eat, poop, sleep, play-with-everyone-and-ignore-mommy-till-I'm-hungry schedule.
Friday, August 3, 2012
Sunday, June 10, 2012
Saturday, May 26, 2012
Friday, May 4, 2012
Wednesday, April 18, 2012
I called up M and told him about it and we laughed at our collective cluelessness. M said, 'Ah, so now we've cracked the Rupasi Bangla mystery!' and I said 'Yes! Thank God!' It's shocking to see that there were almost four tremors that night and we only noticed the first one. This time, there were rumours of a tsunami hitting the eastern coast and we don't live too far away from it, so M came home early and we left the house. It was scary in its own way... we just kept driving around until Baba told us that the tsunami warning had been called off. Alhamdulillah that we didn't lose anything either in 2010 or 12, but gained a story instead.
Thursday, April 5, 2012
Thursday, March 22, 2012
Tuesday, March 20, 2012
Tuesday, March 13, 2012
Monday, March 12, 2012
Tuesday, March 6, 2012
Sunday, March 4, 2012
- - -
Yesterday I found out that Ammaarah has pushed me over to the opposing party whose sole long-suffering member was baba. Apparently I'm only his daughter and apa is only mummy's daughter and Ammaarah is only mummy's granddaughter. So the three of them are on one side and poor baba and I are in the other. I don't know what I've done to deserve this treatment except for asking some inane questions (just to make conversation) that really exhausted the patience of our royal highness. Humph!
- - -
Dear God, please let people on Facebook realize that notifications of all the tasteless articles they're reading via Washington Post social reader and the horrid videos they're watching via Daily Motion are visible to everyone!
- - -
And now for a quick snooze.
Friday, March 2, 2012
Thursday, March 1, 2012
Thursday, February 23, 2012
PS: Apologies for leaving the post incomplete la-that! It's what happens when you're sleep deprived and try to write a post. You're in the middle of the post and you go, 'Ooh! A title box! Let me put something in there!' If I forget something this time, please know that I'm going to use the same excuse. In spite of a nap, I'm still stuck in sleepyhead zone. Okay, enough for now!