Friday, June 17, 2011

Take me away

The work emails in my inbox are the same as always, completely normal. No one with the exception of my manager has told me, hello honey, you gotta go soon. Is that why? Because it's soon and not now? I realized after Fajr in the morning, that the major chunk of work that I was handling is expected to end in a couple of weeks, at the same time that they expect me to be 'released'. That makes me feel so used. But considering that "human capital" is always talked about in terms like 'resource management' or 'utilization', why should that even be a surprise?

 

What is a surprise though, is an email asking me to take on some additional responsibility from the client's side BA. I'm guessing he hasn't been told yet. Now I'm wondering whether I should tell him or just go ahead and work on it, and two weeks later, he'll find that I've Poof!ed. Actually, I'm going to Poof! In a week's time thanks to a visit to Hyderabad.

 

Funny, I'd nearly forgotten about it. I hope I can spend some time with MPAX and her baybees, insha'allah. If it was really possible, I'd just ask her to escape from her place as often as I could, in that one week! I really want a break. I wish I could go to New York L .

 

When ze manager told me yesterday, my brain started the QUIT! QUIT! QUIT! chant out of the blue. But what's the use? I know the money will keep me grounded.

Thursday, June 16, 2011

Dumped

I've been thinking, for more than two weeks now, that I must write about how much more satisfied I am with this job than my previous one. I thought I would mention that it was possibly because of a) lesser workload b) non-crazy deadlines c) I was creating some value that I could identify with d) the lack of cut-throat competition and politics. Or maybe the last one is because I'm in the account-bubble. But what I wanted to say most of all was that it felt better because I felt more indispensable. Not very much so, but just that tiny-weeny bit that's enough to get you through the day.

 

And then my manager called me today and said that my project is ramping down, so they're going to release me from that project considering my billing rate is way higher than the  developers'. There is nothing groundbreaking or fall-in-lovable about my work , but it took me a while to get where I am and it feels like a waste of time. In the meantime, I've started abhorring non-project related work, having got enough of it in the first six months at this job. Now I'm going to have to pick that up again.

 

What feels worse is that until yesterday, despite some mentions of good resource management and cost-cutting, nobody in the project call indicated anything of this sort. My manager seemed to be playing George Clooney from Up In The Air; why couldn't my project manager have given me the bad news?

 

I know that is just the same as being released from a project and I shouldn't feel like I've been fired, but how come it does?
 
Alhamdulillah ala kulli haal.

Monday, June 6, 2011

Sigh

It's 10:20 pm and I'm still on the way home... Mummy and baba are already having dinner at home ... I'm stuck in crawling traffic, breathing in suffocating amounts of fumes...  I had a call until late in  the night... In the afternoon, I had a headache because I slept very little last night... I hope our anniversaries will only get better than this inshallah...